Ultimate Digimon: The Green Flash Army
by LizardMan77
Summary: Young Stoner Conner embalks with his Keramon to try to get home from the Digital World, now if only it were that simple. Rated for language and innuendo. Drug Use. Hell of lot of That.
1. Chapter 1

Ultimate Digimon: The Green Flash Army

Chapter 1: Conner and Schmack

It was Tuesday in London and the main character Conner was out with his mates cos it was hi birthday today. He had brown hair green eyes and was tall.

He was walking home by himself cos his friends had left after the film and MacDonald's. He and his mates went to go see Digimon, The Movie. He was kinda disappointed cos it had them lame arse _new_ Digidestined.

On his way home, he was so high on schmack so he decided to go for a swim at his local beach, until he remembered that he could not swim and started to drown. Then there was this big flash of light and everything went white.


	2. Chapter 2

Ultimate Digimon: The Green Flash Army

Chapter 2: Keramon and the X-Loader

"Yo, wake-up!" A small but deep voice hollered in Conner's ears. "Yo, I'm yo partner! What are you, high or something?"

"Ugh, some motherfucker just ran me over!" Conner griped as he rubbed his temples before he took one look at the new thingy.

"Holy Shit! You're that crazy motherfucker who almost did the world-war-three thing in that Digimon Movie!" Conner shouted.

"Um, yeah? I usually just go by Keramon?" Keramon said, rubbing the back of his head. "Anyways, I'm your partner and you the new General of the New Digimon Army, with this Green X-Loader, you'll save the Digital World."

Conner blinked. "No shit?"


	3. Chapter 3

Ultimate Digimon: The Green Flash Army

Chapter 3: The Knife and ShadowWereGarurumon

Conner looked at were he was. He was in the middle of the North Pole sector of the Digital World. It was always night-time and was very cold.

"So where am I?" Conner asked, stuffing the Green X-Loader into his pocket and pulled out a blunt and a lighter. "More importantly, you do tolk?"

"Course, what am I, a poof?" Keramon said as he took the blunt. "Damn, that's good huff. Where'd you get it?"

Conner sniffed. "Family plantation. My big bro can hook ya up with coke and the folks run a crystal meth lab, and big sis will suck you off for a fiver."

"Nice," Keramon sniggered.

Suddenly a shadow claw attack blasted the snow drift that Conner and Keramon were on. It was ShadowWereGarurumon, and his retarded sidekick, Doggymon. "I say you give me all your stuffs! You dig dog? HOOWWWL!"

"Shut the fuck up!" Conner growled, as he pulled out a switchblade. "Oi, partner-guy, light em up when I'm done."

Conner slid between the Black Werewolf's legs and stabbed him in the ging-gang-ghooleys. He got back up and started to run. "Keramon, blast em!" He called out as he ran like the coward he was.


	4. Chapter 4

Ultimate Digimon: The Green Flash Army

Chapter 4: Ranamon and Burgers

Still in the Icy Barrier, Conner and Keramon were eating pot burgers made from the meat they carved from the deceased carcasses of ShadowWereGarurumon and Doggymon.

"Man, you can cook." Keramon remarked as he bit into his Doggymon.

"I can also drum." Conner said as he chewed on a piece of ShadowWereGarurumon.

"Really. YYZ?" Keramon asked.

"Nah, Neil Peart stands alone," Conner replied. He began to look at the dying fire. "We should start to get out of here; I'm freezing my ass off."

Meanwhile another Digimon, a Ranamon, was watching the pair.

"Oh my, that tall one is certainly cute, I certainly wouldn't mind having him rape the cum out of me, for certain." She thought as she began to follow the pair. It was not long before she slipped on some ice. She soon saw Conner, cocking Keramon like a rifle.

"Um," She gulped. "Hey."


	5. Chapter 5

Ultimate Digimon: The Green Flash Army

Chapter 5: Cock and Capture

Conner cocked Keramon, who readied a Bug Blaster. Ranamon squirmed.

"What do you want?" Conner growled.

"Other than you huge cock?" Ranamon giggled. "I heard you two are started an Army."

Conner pulled out his Green X-Loader. "Yeah, I guess."

"I want in." Ranamon sang.

"What could you possibly give to the Army?" Keramon questioned.

"I know where the nearest settlement is." Ranamon trailed off, before she was sucked into the X-Loader.

"You got yourself a deal." Conner said.


End file.
